You’re gonna eat lightning and you’re gonna crap thunder

My favorite moments in movies aren’t sex scenes, car chases, training montages, or even the assemble your team recruitment sequences in heist thrillers.

What I love most are the moments of encouragement. When the protagonist is feeling worthless, like they don’t belong, isolated and overwhelmed by the circumstances surrounding them.

At which point, the mentor character delivers a speech reminding the main character that they’re better than they think they are.

Now, this person giving the encouragement doesn’t know how significant their words are, at least at first. But as the films progresses, we soon realize that the speech helped the despairing hero heal, inspired them to take action, and maybe even saved their life.

Why are these scenes so memorable? What’s so special about some old and grizzled boxing coach yelling to the impending champ, you’re gonna eat lightning and you’re gonna crap thunder?

Simple. Because encouragement is one of the few things in this world that costs nothing, but has the power to change everything.

Not every single time, obviously. There is no guarantee that our words of affirmation will be the thing that quickens people’s will to live and vaults them to the next level. Sometimes people aren’t ready to hear what we have to say, and our encouragement goes in one ear and out the other.

But in my experience, encouragement is one of those things that works enough of the time, that it’s always worth a shot.

I was fortunate to grow up in a deeply encouraging family. My parents and grandparents are fundamentally affirmative people. Their actions proved to me that there’s no upside to not believing in others. It’s this gift we can give to anyone, anytime, anywhere.

That’s why I have always enjoyed saying or writing positive things encourage others to persevere in the face of hardship. I find it meaningful to share words of inspiration with those who lack confidence. And I’m pretty good at it. Been doing it a long time. Sharing words of encouragement with others who are feeling dejected is a skill.

What’s more, I get super excited about inspiring others to realize their potential. It’s one way that I create meaning for myself, and add value to others.

But here’s an aspect to this process most people don’t think about.

We have to encourage the encouragers. Passing the gift along is the act of gratitude the completes the labor.

Hyde writes in one of my favorite books of all time:

Giving the first creation away makes the second possible. Bestowal creates that energy place into which new energy may flow. If the object is a gift, it keeps on moving, so your gift is not fully yours until it is given away. And as long as the gift is not withheld, the creative spirit will remain a stranger to the economics of scarcity.

Meaning, if someone’s words of encouragement provided us with hope during a difficult time, then we need to tell them about it. If a friend offered us just the right words of affirmation when we were feeling useless, then that moment should be memorialized.

Doing this enables reciprocity, sustains motivation, amplifies impact and builds confidence. When we encourage the encouragers, it creates a virtuous cycle of support and motivation. When we bear witness the uplifting effect of encouragement, people are more likely to engage in similar acts, fostering a ripple effect of positivity.

I practice this form of meta encouragement often. One ritual is to go back and find pivotal emails people sent me years ago, and resend them to those same people today. Usually with a quick note like this.

Jason, you may or may not remember sending me this message a decade ago, but I certainly never forgot it. Just wanted to say how grateful I am for your support all these years. I don’t know if things would be the same today, had you not encouraged me.

How wonderful would it feel to receive an email like that? Wouldn’t you be fulfilled if someone reminded you that something you said years ago encouraged them to pursue their dreams?

It’s more gratifying that any sex scene you’ll ever watch. The power of this ritual cannot be denied. We must recognize people’s role in uplifting us. This is a form of encouragement that operates on a reflective level and affirms the significance of their efforts. Doing so strengthens someone’s sense of purpose and inspires them to continue cheerleading others down the road, knowing that their role is appreciated and impactful. It’s almost selfish in a way.

Because you’re essentially telling someone, I am thanking your for making me feel good about myself, in the hopes that you will do it again in the future.

It’s the reason I still insist on paying money for books. Sure, I could easily go to the library and check them out, or read the pirated copies on the internet. But selfishly, I want these authors I love to have my money, because I want them to use that money to write more books for me.

Meta encouragement, then, is not a completely benevolent act. There’s something in it for us too. And that’s okay. Encouraging the encourager is a way of adding an extra layer of recognition and support, which fosters a positive feedback loop that enhances people’s ability to continue spreading the support.

We are keeping the love in circulation.

Whose encouragement would you not be here without? Have you ever taken the time to thank them for it?

Maybe this is why speeches at sporting events and award shows always make me tear up. Whether it’s the actor who thanks their teacher for believing in them before they believed in themselves; the athlete who credits a coach for reassuring them when they were still a nobody; or the comedian who thanks their older brother for being the first audience they ever had, I can’t help but well up.

Because in a life that can be cruel, cold, complicated and chaotic, encouragement costs nothing. It’s the most underrated natural resource on the planet, and when deployed with the proper intention and attention, has the power to change everything.

The more of it we use, the more of it we have; and the more of it we give thanks for, the more of it we have.

Anytime we receive affirmation that enhances our motivation within the context of challenging situation, we should consider ourselves blessed.

Anytime positive words give us the courage to pursue new opportunities that we didn’t previously consider, we should feel sick with sweet gratitude.

Anytime we inhale copious doses of affirmation that counter our imposter worries, we should count our lucky stars. Indeed, it’s both a gift and a skill.

If we’re fortune enough to be on the receiving end of it, then we do humanity a great disservice by keeping it a secret.

It might not make us eat lightning and crap thunder, but at least we’ll be keeping love in circulation.

How are you creating virtuous cycle of support and motivation, fostering a ripple effect of positivity?