When the bar is low, the magic is high

Emotional generosity is a meaningful personality trait to cultivate.

Being tolerant of flaws and imperfections is a good thing. Letting go of what something should have been, and appreciating its reality, is healthy.

And not in a guilty pleasure kind of way. I don’t believe in guilty pleasures. I believe in shameless enthusiasms.

I am not embarrassed to enjoy something others consider bad. I don’t fear judgment or ridicule. I don’t need to avoid bad products to uphold some cultivated appearance of good taste. Taste is bullshit. People like what they like. Look man, life is hard. We take our joy wherever we can find it. So who am I to decide what is or is not worth liking?

Hey, if I learned anything from existentialist philosophy, it’s that value is deeply personal and subjective. Meaning is made, not found. And diverse standards of appreciation can exist. Especially since we live in a world where everyone rips apart everything within seconds of its execution, seeing the good in creative ambition and the human drive to produce, is refreshing.

If you’re exhausted trying to find the perfect gift for someone, try a little emotional generosity instead. Acknowledge people’s effort despite outcomes. Embrace things as they are, rather than lamenting what they should have been.

And if you have time, extend that same kindness towards yourself. Embrace your taste and experiences without criticism. Even when, and especially when, something is instantly terrible.

Isn’t that what mindfulness is? Adopting an accepting attitude to whatever arises?

Cognitive psychologists have enough data now to prove that mindfulness leads to higher levels of happiness and wellbeing.

You want to survive the festivities? Try this. When you get caught in a parade of instantly terrible moments, double down. Find reasons to celebrate the absolute absence of quality.

If your mother in law wants to watch a romcom where two small town rival bakers fall in love in a gingerbread house, finally admit their feelings for each other, and then share a sweet kiss under a mistletoe arch made of candy canes, grab a mug of hot chocolate and settle in. ]

Doesn’t that sound better than eating and drinking your feelings while festering with resentment?

My theory is, when the bar is low, the magic is high.

Are you someone who can appreciate the effort despite the outcome?