The goal isn’t to park better, it’s to see bigger

An insurance comparison company once published a study about the fear of parallel parking.

Out of two thousand people, one third of drivers admit they have it. More than half of them had gone past an empty space because it meant they would have had to carry out the procedure. Three in ten admitted to parking more than a mile from their destination rather than attempt to parallel park. And one in five said they would rather continue to circle around a street until an easier space becomes available.

Now, to be fair, this isn’t an entirely irrational fear. The possibility of nicking one of the cars around you is quite stressful. Having to leave behind that humiliating note on a stranger’s windshield is the worst.

Interestingly, in a world with reversing cameras, proximity sensors and automated parking functions, some drivers may never have had enough practice to master this skill.

It reminds me of my valet parking job. On nights when the hotel was slow, we’d pair up and take turns in the garage practicing parallel parking with the company vehicle. The old fashioned way, too. No cheating with cameras or beeping computers.

Veteran employees would sit shotgun and coach the new guys through it.

Line the car up, use your mirrors, proceed carefully, check the distance, adjust your position, park the car, engage the emergency brake, turn the steering wheel, and you’re done.

It actually wasn’t as scary as it first seemed. Within two months, my parking skills were astonishing. Even today, I still refuse to use the camera.

And I remember one night my boss sharing his method to the madness. He said:

The purpose of overcoming your fear isn’t to park better, it’s to see bigger. To make you a more opportunistic traveler. Once you’re no longer afraid, you can actually enjoy the ride. Just look at all these spaces you can now take advantage of. Every street you drive down will be filled with a wealth of spots where your car can easy fit.

How many unnecessary miles have you walked because you were afraid? What amazing destinations might you have missed along the way?

That’s the thing about our fears. They make us process incoming data in a way that reinforces our picture of scarcity, rather than abundance. Perfectly good openings may be right in front of our eyes, but they escape our field of vision.

And whether it’s learning how to parallel park, or some other tricky skill that’s been haunting you for years, it’s not about increasing your success, it’s expanding your field of vision.

That’s what allows you to better notice the opportunities that lead to success. It’s about experience, not outcome. Instead of responding to threats, you’re expanding assets.

And sure, you may accidentally give a little love tap to the car behind you every once in a while. Full transparency, when started my valet parking job, I dented my share of bumpers. Like that brand new electric blue luxury convertible that still had the temporary plates on it. I smashed the car right into a concrete pillar. Ripped the entire side mirror off the door. Woops.

Thank god we had good insurance.

I guess what I’m trying to say is, never park valet at luxury a hotel.

Point being, once your anxiety briefly lets its guard down, you can finally allow real happiness to take hold. And actually enjoy the ride.

It’s not about parking better, it’s about seeing bigger.

Sure sounds better than circling around a street until an easier space becomes available.

How many unnecessary miles have your fears made you walk?