At least they took some artistic risks, that’s not nothing

Some things are instantly terrible.

They’re bad without any ambiguity or delay in judgment. Your body has an immediate, visceral response to its low quality.

Maybe it’s an idea that, the moment it crosses your lips, you already wish you hadn’t said it. Or a situation so unpleasant that, once it begins, you say to yourself, wow, I immediately regret this decision.

This is an important human experience. Instantly terrible is a reminder just how quickly and clearly a negative evaluation can occur, without the need for further analysis.

And the more attuned we are to this response, the better. Its roots are deeply evolutionary. Instantly terrible is a survival mechanism. Humans used it to make rapid, life preserving decisions in environments full of potential dangers.

Poison berries, venomous animals, unsafe conditions, and instantly terrible is a highly useful evaluation. If our fellow caveman snaps a branch off a tree, chews on the bark, and then starts bleeding rectally within minutes, it’s safe to say we don’t need any further personal experience to avoid that tree in the future.

Now, in modern life, the stakes are often less dire. There’s quite a difference between eating poisonous plants and watching cheesy holiday movies.

But instantly terrible still matters. And not always for the worse. Sometimes recognizing low quality is a signal. It’s a wink from creator to consumer.

As if to say, hey, we aren’t taking ourselves too seriously. We know this product is a steaming piece of dookie, and you should too. Because that’s what makes it great. Enjoy!

I love when this happens. There is a specific brand of joy I feel while experiencing an instantly terrible thing. I recently rewatched an eighties wrestling movie that was almost certainly written in a hotel room on a coke binge over a single weekend. This movie was violent, sexist and blood soaked in a way that studios just don’t make anymore.

Now, did I watch it for nostalgic purposes? Sure. The film evoked memories from when I was a kid. And was it unintentionally comedic? You bet. I laughed so hard, my wife came into my office to see what all the commotion was.

The other thing about bad things is, they foster social bonding. I texted my childhood best friend that I was watching the movie, and that created shared enjoyment between us.

Also worth mentioning is, there’s the rebellion piece. I enjoy rejecting societal standards of quality. Preferring bad products makes me feel defiant of mainstream culture. I feel like myself when I celebrate junk. It gives me a sense of moral and intellectual superiority over hypercritical, closed minded people.

But all of those motivations aside, here’s the key reason instantly terrible things matter to me.

Because I appreciate effort. Even if the result is flawed, I believe it’s important to admire the creativity and ambition behind everything. This kind of emotional generosity can make almost anything endearing, despite its shortcomings.

And the thing is, I’m not fascinated with how bad things were made or why they failed. I don’t feel the need to analyze and deconstruct what went wrong. I’m just happy they’re out there. I love knowing that a team of hundreds of people spent eight million dollars and a year of their lives putting this piece of shit together.

Their execution may have fallen flat, but they at least they took some artistic risks. That’s not nothing.

Compare that to a movie to one that is instantly terrible, but not in a good way. My curiosity isn’t piqued, watching it feels like a waste of time, and there’s no way to reframe it as a bad experience worth having. When I find myself irritated and disgusted after five minutes, I trust my instincts and stop.

How do you feel about low quality things? Are you someone who can appreciate the effort despite the outcome?