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I don’t think bragging about my work is appropriate

Victory Dance

VICTORY DANCE@2x

The Context

One of our chief goals in life is to make ourselves proud. To experience the satisfaction of having lived up to our expectations for ourselves. And so, any time we write or compose or code or perform a piece of work that we’re legitimately proud of, it’s important to take a moment, look at the art and say, wow, now that’s really good, nice job. To forget all about our cultural conditioning that says modesty is a virtue and being pleased with ourselves is somehow a sin, and stand in recognition of our accomplishment and think, nailed it. This brand of acknowledgement is a simple, free and easy way to be more kind to ourselves. It’s also what keeps the creative channel open. What we appreciate, appreciates. Loving yourself is not an indulgence.

The Tool

two color

Victory Dance

VICTORY DANCE — The act of loving ourselves by acknowledging moments when we’re proud of our completed work

The professional golfer comes to mind. When they want to express the profound satisfaction derived from knock- ing a tiny ball from one place to another, they do a fist pump. It’s the universal celebratory gesture to denote enthusiasm and exuberance for a job well done. Tiger did it best when he won his fourth green jacket. And so, we learn from the athlete. We pump our fists, in whatever way we choose, without fear of immodesty or persecution or harassment, without worrying about receiving penalty strokes from excessive celebration. There’s no governing body or rules official or ethics committee who’s going to scold us for loving ourselves. We can do whatever we want. And that includes acknowledging moments when we make ourselves proud. At the expense of not appearing humble, turn off your modesty filters, surrender your false humility and give yourself a good fist pump.

Scott's Take

Scott's Take

My default response, especially during the creative process, is to pull the whip out and start beating myself up. Like many sensitive and critical artsy fartsy types, I have a habit of being too hard on myself. And yet, despite the pull of my negativity bias, I’m learning to err on the side of affirmation. Instead of waving a scornful finger at every misstep, I’m giving myself the recognition I deserve for my efforts. Because it’s not about right or wrong, good or bad, winning or losing. Binaries like that create ulcers. What matters is that you demonstrate to yourself that you are determined to move forward.

The Rest

What matters is that you appreciate each execution that comes along, not as proof of worth, but as the next installment of your continuing saga. That’s the mindset guaranteed to turn your dreams into realities. When was the last time you congratulated yourself? How are you practicing being kind to yourself in small, concrete ways?

The Benefits

Bolster our artistic confidence
Improve our ability to celebrate small wins
Increase compassion for accomplishments
Experience the satisfaction of having lived up to our expectations for ourselves

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